Video: Shane Collins

Peanut Butter

West Town Bakery & Diner
1916 W. Chicago Ave. and15 E. Ohio St., westtownbakery.com
$32 for six-inch round cake

Peanut Butter cake
The Critic The Kids
Lovely and moist. It’s got a glorious thin layer of peanut butter.

     
Max: It smells good at the bottom.

     

Salted Caramel

Vanille
See vanillepatisserie.com for locations.
$37 for six-inch round cake

Salted Caramel cake
The Critic The Kids
The ratio of icing to cake is huge. But the buttercream frosting is barely identifiable as salted caramel.

     
Hannah: It’s a light, fluffy, gentle cake. Cakes have emotions. I expected this to be more playful.
Avi: I like gentle cakes.

     

Vanilla

Mariano’s
See marianos.com for locations.
$13 for eight-inch round cake

Vanilla cake
The Critic The Kids
There is a weird salt taste. It’s a little off-putting. And this frosting. It’s like a Smurf coughed something up and put it on a cake.

     
Avi: Pleh. I don’t like the frosting.
Hannah: I smell Play-Doh. Is that just me?

     

Rainbow

Bake
2246 W. North Ave., getbakedchicago.com
$35 for six-inch round cake

Rainbow cake
The Critic The Kids
It looks amazing. Like a sugar bomb. Turns out it’s more buttery than sweet. But I like the crunch from the sprinkles.

     
Hannah: No. With the sprinkles it’s too crunchy. It’s too unbalanced.
Max: Every color tastes the same. But I’d pick it for my birthday.

     

Cookie Dough

Molly’s Cupcakes
2536 N. Clark St. and 419 E. Illinois St., mollyscupcakes.com
$32 for six-inch round cake

Cookie Dough cake
The Critic The Kids
If you’re the kind of person who likes to lick the beaters when you make cookies, this is heaven.

     
Hannah: Putting cookie dough in a cake is ingenious. But it can get really trippy. It’s a fine line, you know.
Avi: I love this cake, and I love myself!

     

Red Velvet

Fabiana’s Bakery
5655 S. University Ave., fabianasbakery.com
$35 for six-inch round cake

Red Velvet cake
The Critic The Kids
This icing is perfect. Really spot-on. Is it cooked roux or cream cheese?

     
Max: The frosting doesn’t taste like cream cheese. Then again, I don’t eat cream cheese. Except on a bagel.
Hannah: Great cake.
Avi: It tastes like raspberries.

     

Sheet

Jewel-Osco
See jewelosco.com for locations.
$35 for half a cake

Sheet cake
The Critic The Kids
Typical oversweet grocery store sheet cake. Wow, this is so moist someone should call a plumber. And I still eat every bite.

     
Max: It tasted better than my sheets.

     

Layer

Deerfields Bakery
See deerfieldsbakery.com for locations.
$21 for eight-inch round cake

Layer cake
The Critic The Kids
The top looks like a bridal bouquet at a wedding I’d never be invited to. The vanilla layer overwhelms the chocolate.

     
Max: If I was at a birthday party, I’d only eat a quarter of a piece.

     

Snickerdoodle

Sweet Mandy B’s
1208 W. Webster Ave., sweetmandybs.com
$26 for six-inch round cake

Snickerdoodle cake
The Critic The Kids
Ooh, three layers. And it’s really nuanced, just a whisper of cinnamon.

     
Hannah: I’d want this at my birthday party. But it’s so boring to look at.
Max: Who cares what it looks like? You eat it.

     
Max, Hannah, and Avi  Photos: Dave Rentauskas